TL: “The second letter to AP.”

The second letter to AP was much better than the first. That woman kept e-mailing, stating Mindless must contact her, then she would give an address for him to send her stuff. If he did not contact her, she would be filing a missing person’s report and/or a police report for the recovery of her things. I had been asking him to write her and let her know that a) he had no interest in her whatsoever and b) all of her belongings had been trashed long ago. Upon ultimate d-day, he finally wrote her again and he made it all very clear once and for all. I felt that he had not only closed that door, but slammed it irrevocably shut forever!

She wrote back that he was lying about her things. At this point I wrote to her myself.


I honestly don’t know what will happen with my marriage. I am shattered into a billion little pieces.

I am the one who destroyed all of your belongings. I figured out what had happened a few hours after he sent you the e-mail asking for an address to send your stuff.  I saw all the emails and found your things. I was so angry. I ripped apart your blouse, I stomped on your perfume box, then I tore the view screen of the camera and jumped up and down on it. I took out the picture card and cut it in half. This was when I thought you were the first and only. Obviously, you were only the tip of the iceberg.

As I said I am broken, shattered and confused. The person I loved most in the world did this to me and you were part of it. I have to find a way beyond this pain – G-d willing. Please let us move on.


She wrote back with this:

To: TL

subject: Do not worry

Do not worry, TL, thanks for letting me know.

Take care of him and yourself. Your love for each other will only grow bigger, keep faith in what God can do for you both and you will see.

And then a few hours later she sent this:

To: TL

subject: hope this helps

Healing a bruised soul can be a very long journey, TL.
The hardest part on that journey is to completely forgive the one who has hurt you the most. We want to be forgiven but we forget to forgive others.
You see I forgave you about the camera and the pictures – they were incidentally with him and very precious to me and my family, unrelated to him.
You were in pain and I empathise. But do not stay angry with him. From the little I know it seems he was trying perhaps somehow to overpower you.
May be without realizing it you in a different way were trying to overpower him. That happens when one does not realize God really has the higher power.
If you can both truly forgive each other, then love wins. Forgiving someone is like becoming free and obedient to God at the same time. If you are both able to do that God will heal your marriage. But you must stay the course…as habits must be broken, not cameras. This is what I think may help. Such kind of relationship is worth keeping and not only for the sake of your children, which are very important. Wishing your entire family health and happiness.

And that was the last of her, or so I thought. A few months later we received a series of e-mails, from her e-mail address, supposedly from a photographer friend, claiming the camera was actually his and demanding money for the camera and the pictures, which now, supposedly, were from his professional shoots on behalf of AP in years prior. He wanted $5000.

It was a simple point and shoot digital camera and the disk inside was labeled with a date from three years prior. If he really existed, why wouldn’t he write from his own e-mail address? The “friend” claimed to be in touch with an attorney and would be filing a police report if we did not make this right immediately, stating the AP3 had been victimized enough and that I, TL, should be ashamed of myself for further victimizing AP3.

I wrote back pointing out an entire series of inconsistencies and stated that if they would simply give me their attorney’s name, contact information and ABA# that I would go hire an attorney immediately as I would rather spend thousands of dollars on an attorney fighting this than to be stalked, harassed or blackmailed by AP3.

We never heard from her (or any of her supposed friends) again.


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